Guest post by Tammy Adams.
Many don’t understand grief and what it takes away.
Have you ever lost a job, gone through a divorce, relocated, experienced a major financial change, or had someone close to you die? Are you aware, due to these experiences, you may have experienced grief?
If we have ever experienced an emotional loss of any kind, there is a very good chance we have experienced grief. Our minds are conditioned to believe grief only applies to death or divorce. For that reason, many do not understand there are other causes of grief, what grief can take away from them, and how it can negatively impact our ability to enjoy life.
Many individuals, who have not experienced the death of a loved one, can overlook their buried emotions. They can be unaware their unfinished business could be hindering their recovery from the pain of their altered life situations. Furthermore, they may not be aware by discovering stored emotions, and choosing to heal, they have the ability to reclaim their happiness.
It is important to begin with an understanding of the definition of grief. According to The Grief Recovery Institute, grief is the normal and natural reaction to any emotional loss. Grief is also the conflicting feelings caused by the end of, or change in, a familiar pattern of behaviour.
Most grief is the result of something we wished had been better, different, or more; unrealized hopes, dreams, and expectations; and finally unsaid communications. When The Grief Recovery Institute refers to completion it is in reference to this unfinished business.
There are over 40 reasons why we might grieve for example graduating, emotional trauma resulting from abuse, estrangements, broken relationship, the death of a pet, loss of health, retirement, etc. and without the proper tools to process our grief, sadness can seem like the new normal.
Our bodies were never meant to act as an emotional storage facility but rather were designed to process our emotions. When buried and ignored our grief can manifest physically and emotionally. We can become sick, distracted, and unproductive. Feeling misunderstood by family and friends we can isolate ourselves and step away from much of our day-to-day life. Pushing down our grief uses a lot of energy. It can be likened to trying to hold a beach ball below the surface of the water. When we least expect it, the ball slips from our grasp and breaks the surface of the water, forcing us to face our pain.
It is important to note there are not a set of stages of grief but rather emotions or symptoms grievers may, or may not, experience. Some common responses are a lack of concentration, a sense of numbness, a change in eating or sleeping habits, or riding a roller coaster of unexpected and misunderstood emotions.
Forgetting the past is not the goal of recovery. While normal and natural grief was never meant to be a destination. What we have never been taught, is that it is possible to set down our emotional burden, and when we do we feel lighter, freer, energized, focused, at peace, and with renewed hope for the future.
For more information please visit my website www.tadams.ca for FREE EBooks, blogs, schedule a FREE discovery call, or complete the grief questionnaire to identify any losses you may have experienced.
Tammy Adams is a Certified Coach Practitioner & Grief Recovery Method Specialist supporting individuals Canada-wide in person or via the Internet. To learn more about The Grief Recovery Method please visit www.tadams.ca or contact Tammy for a free consultation.
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